One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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