Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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