I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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