HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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