someone get that fucking seahorse.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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