He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
