And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
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