You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
