Bisexual people are plain selfish.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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