this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
smell my finger.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
