she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
