Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
