Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
