That's intense
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
