At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize