I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
