Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy. http://tfl.nu/1tnq
  Replies (7) Good night (1744) Bad night (446)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship http://tfl.nu/iroi
  Replies (19) Good night (4431) Bad night (987)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel http://tfl.nu/fa0o
  Replies (6) Good night (3744) Bad night (597)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover. http://tfl.nu/1njk
  Replies (14) Good night (3049) Bad night (1117)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (817): No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever. http://tfl.nu/v4fg
  Replies (13) Good night (5533) Bad night (1088)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you. http://tfl.nu/r8h0
  Replies (12) Good night (1128) Bad night (3486)
• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  You told him you loved him!?

  (1-260): View more from Indiana

  I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (260): You told him you loved him!? (1-260): I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes. http://tfl.nu/duby
  Replies (6) Good night (2660) Bad night (934)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.

  (1-406): View more from Montana

  Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight. (1-406): Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it. http://tfl.nu/p8t9
  Replies (10) Good night (3383) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I just found my coat check number in my underwear.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): I just found my coat check number in my underwear. http://tfl.nu/l4ok
  Replies (4) Good night (1786) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me http://tfl.nu/peek
  Replies (9) Good night (3380) Bad night (936)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs. http://tfl.nu/rhuf
  Replies (9) Good night (3629) Bad night (689)
• Favorite

  (209): View more from California

  Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (209): Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something http://tfl.nu/htcf
  Replies (23) Good night (947) Bad night (3326)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.

  (909): View more from California

  Whaaaaaat? No way.

  (206): View more from Washington

  Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag. (909): Whaaaaaat? No way. (206): Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier. http://tfl.nu/t9qj
  Replies (16) Good night (531) Bad night (1875)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (814): I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom. http://tfl.nu/k57f
  Replies (6) Good night (852) Bad night (550)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours http://tfl.nu/47o4
  Replies (0) Good night (392) Bad night (183)

Randomize