I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
