Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
