The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
not ubering you a puppy
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize