Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I smell stomach acid.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
