We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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