quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
