Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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