Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
