I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
