I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Randomize
