Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
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