I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize