i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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