Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
She just used a chaser for red wine.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
