dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Drunk is a universal language darling
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
