That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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