i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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