scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize
