Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
