Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(818): View more from California

Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(818): Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls. http://tfl.nu/r53n

Replies (3) Good night (556) Bad night (1085) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(517): View more from Michigan

Tell her she can't have a vagina

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(517): Tell her she can't have a vagina http://tfl.nu/krch

Replies (3) Good night (732) Bad night (516) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(586): View more from Michigan

theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(586): theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid. http://tfl.nu/psvc

Replies (12) Good night (859) Bad night (7220) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(530): View more from California

You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(530): You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger. http://tfl.nu/48s1

Replies (58) Good night (3427) Bad night (7588) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(778): View more from British Columbia

i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(778): i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome. http://tfl.nu/42ph

Replies (15) Good night (2280) Bad night (559) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(404): View more from Georgia

I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!

(1-404): View more from Georgia

what drugs are you on?

(404): View more from Georgia

none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(404): I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles! (1-404): what drugs are you on? (404): none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later http://tfl.nu/mtfu

Replies (26) Good night (5163) Bad night (698)
Favorite
(859): View more from Kentucky

The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(859): The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know. http://tfl.nu/3jb2

Replies (17) Good night (5703) Bad night (599) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(626): View more from California

Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?

(308): View more from Nebraska

Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(626): Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened? (308): Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex. http://tfl.nu/5y08

Replies (17) Good night (4572) Bad night (949)
Favorite
(405): View more from Oklahoma

He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(405): He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night. http://tfl.nu/m9rk

Replies (4) Good night (2588) Bad night (455) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(770): View more from Georgia

She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(770): She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?! http://tfl.nu/j94r

Replies (18) Good night (423) Bad night (1894) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(814): View more from Pennsylvania

This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(814): This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off. http://tfl.nu/kq64

Replies (11) Good night (497) Bad night (899) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(+44): He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits. http://tfl.nu/wm8o

Replies (15) Good night (3406) Bad night (674)
Favorite
(407): View more from Florida

You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(407): You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window. http://tfl.nu/325b

Replies (5) Good night (752) Bad night (295) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(518): View more from New York

Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(518): Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet http://tfl.nu/g9l7

Replies (4) Good night (723) Bad night (337) Order T-Shirt
Favorite
(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(902): after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart. http://tfl.nu/tash

Replies (4) Good night (711) Bad night (200) Order T-Shirt

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: