Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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