I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
