I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
