all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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