Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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