It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize