also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize