Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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