never play flip cup with pint glasses
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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