Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
