with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
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