she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
