He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
