Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
